“All My Life’s A Circle”
(from Rabbi Bennett's farewell sermon from October 24, 2003)

. . . I am, indeed, uncertain of what is to come, not only tonight, but in the future. In a few short weeks, I will be joining my family in St. Louis, as we begin the next chapter of our lives. With humility and gratitude I reflect upon these ten years, during which I have been privileged to be one of your rabbis, and blessed to call you my friends.

It was ten and a half years ago that the once-young rabbi I was, together with Amy, my wife and life's partner, decided that we would set out on a grand adventure to North Carolina. We weren't even sure where Charlotte was until we looked at the map. Ten years later, we are filled with love, memories and blessings, because of all of you. As Rabbi Schindler's beautiful reading of the Torah reminded us, there are times when we reflect upon our lives and the world around us and proclaim, "This is good. This is Very Good!"

Indeed, it is very good! . . . . The words of the Psalmist remind us, "Hinei Mah Tov u'manaim shevet achim gam yachad - How good it is, and how pleasant for us to dwell together!" It has been good for us to dwell together here in Charlotte, and I am overwhelmed with emotion as I search for the words with which to say thank you, and goodbye!

Someone recently asked me to describe the most memorable things about my time here in Charlotte. For a fleeting moment, I thought of the excitement of offering the invocation at the Hornets or Panthers games before tens of thousands of people, meeting dignitaries and influential individuals like Mother Theresa, Elizabeth Dole or Marian Wright Edelman, Elie Wiesel and countless others. Quickly, though, I began to reflect on what had left the greatest impression on me.

You've probably seen a series of questions that make their way around the e-mail circuit from time to time: Name the five wealthiest people in the world. Name the last five Super Bowl winners. Name the last five winners of the Miss America contest. Name the last five Academy Award winners for best actor or actress.

I suspect I know how well you did with these questions. None of us really remembers the headliners of yesterday. They are the best in their fields, but they are ultimately peripheral to our lives. Their legacy soon evaporates.

Not so with another kind of legacy. Try these questions now: List some teachers who helped you through school. Name three friends who helped you through difficult times. Name three people who taught you something worthwhile. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Easier? Reflecting on ten years here, the people and experiences I have shared here at Temple Beth El with all of you are what truly matters, and that I will never forget. You, and many others, are the teachers, the friends, the caring people who have made a difference for me, Amy, Abby, Ethan and Michelle, and we are deeply grateful. You are all Temple Beth El.

This name, Beth El, comes from one of the most beautiful passages in the Torah -- the story of our ancestor Jacob and his famous dream of a ladder ascending towards heaven. In this remarkable narrative, Jacob pauses on his journey, and falls asleep, only to dream of this stairway to Heaven. When he awakens from his dream he realizes that he has encountered God, and speaks these awe-filled words: "Yesh Elohim bamakom hazeh, v'anochi lo yadati - there is God in this place, and I knew it not." He then builds an altar, and calls the name of the place Beit El -- Beth El - the house of God.

Like Jacob, I have been on a journey, and my time here in Charlotte has been like a dream. Little did we imagine, when we first arrived, that we would spend ten years here- and now, in a sense, I awaken from this dream and reflect upon the journey. I, too, say, "there is God in this place, and I knew it not - this is Beth El, a House of God."

Jacob not only understood that the presence of God could be encountered at Beth El - his words also teach that he encountered himself in his epiphany. As Rabbi Lawrence Kushner teaches, Jacob might well have said, "There is God in this place, and I - I did not even know myself!"

I have learned so much during the past ten years...both the mundane and the sacred. My family and I have learned a great deal since we first looked into the atlas to see where North Carolina was. We know the geography of the South far better, we can sing the praises of North and South Carolina, we love the beaches and mountains,.....We have learned to eat grits, to say "Hey!" instead of "Hi!" and "Uptown" instead of "Downtown." The only thing I still don't understand is NASCAR!

I am proud of so much that we have learned together during the past ten years....... Together we have created a remarkable Social Action Committee and program, which ensures that Temple Beth El constantly reaches beyond our own walls to help others throughout our city. We have developed a nationally recognized program of Interfaith and Outreach, which does so much to welcome and integrate interfaith couples, assuring that all of our members will feel welcomed and included in our congregational life. We have developed an amazing Caring Community that reaches in as well as out, seeking to care for and nurture each member of our community. We have a Second Family team and a R.A.I.N. team, and we continue to find new ways to help and care and love.

We have developed a mature and sophisticated Jewish educational program for children and adults, we have continued to strive to created transformative and meaning-filled Worship services, we have a thriving and active group - Chavurah Keshet - that includes members of the Gay and Lesbian community in congregational life, we have an outstanding pre-school, high school, Youth groups, seniors group, brotherhood and sisterhood....I can go on and on! I cannot and do not take credit for all of these accomplishments, but I am proud of who and what we are.

Our physical growth has been remarkable, as the congregation has grown from 450 to 1100 families in ten years, but far more important to me is our growth as a loving, caring, joyous Jewish community.

Like Jacob, I not only can see how great my environment has grown and flourished - I realize how much I have grown. With your wonderful guidance and nurturing, I have sought to learn to be more patient, a better listener, a more spiritual rabbi. You have helped me to make progress in becoming a better leader, more mature, more sensitive, more creative. You have helped me to become and grow as a rabbi.

The programs and things we have accomplished are wonderful, the lessons I have learned are deep and meaningful, but what I will take most as I leave this community are the precious relationships with so many of you, with whom our lives and souls have become intertwined. There are so many people, each of whom has touched my life and changed me:

So many Temple presidents, board members, members, and of course, Temple staff, who bless my life each and every day - special people like Betty Lou Crawford, Steve Rosenauer, Pam Linker, Cherie Flitton, Becky Cohen, Stephanie Di Paolo, Joan Makley, Ken Davidson, Thelma Thacker, Donald Thacker, Floyd McDowell, Vanessa Curry, Bea Cunningham, and so many others. Without you and your love and hard work, these ten years would not have been possible.

And my fellow clergy and professionals, with whom I have been privileged to share this pulpit through the years - John Blizzard, with whom it all began, Cantor Linda Shepherd, Rabbi Adam Morris, Rabbi Jessica Spitalnic, and of course, Susan Kramer, of blessed memory, and my current colleagues, Arthur Kramer, Cantor Andy Bernard, Rabbi Judy Schindler, Rabbi Jeremy Barras, and Susan Jacobs. You have been my partners in this grand adventure, you are my colleagues, but even more, you are my friends. There will be other rabbis, cantors and executive directors and educators, but there will never be anyone to take each of your place.

There are the very dear and special friends to me and my family, who have blessed our lives with your love, your support, your caring and concern, with whom we have laughed and cried. We will carry your friendship with us across the miles and through the years.

In Hebrew, there really is no word for goodbye. Instead, we say "L'hitraot" - "See you later," or "Until we meet again." I've never been much at saying goodbye. Few of us are. The ten years my family and I have spent here in Charlotte, as a part of this congregation, as a part of this community, are indelibly imprinted upon our memories. We will never forget. We are changed forever, and touched immeasurably by the love we have felt in your midst.

Amy and I came here ten years ago, as a young couple, with two young children, to begin an adventure in our lives together. During these years so much has happened - Michelle was born, my mother and father both died, our children began to grown up, our marriage matured, we grew, we learned, we gained deep and lasting friendships.

These years have been filled with joys and sorrows, celebrations and moments of sadness. Yet through it all, we have been blessed with all of your presence, and we have felt the presence of God.

Our journey here is about to come to an end, but not the feelings, emotions and ties that bind us together. Even though my family and I will be living miles away, so much of our hearts will remain here in Charlotte. I know that we'll stay in touch, that our lives will still be intertwined, and pray that we may always feel together in love, hope, faith.

And so I say to you with love: Shalom, Peace! L'hitraot - Until we meet again!

My hero, Harry Chapin, who I have often mentioned, offers me the best way in which to conclude my thoughts tonight, and I hope you will join hands and hearts, and join me as we conclude together. For the words of his song, Circle, which we have sung together before, says it all and more...

Circle by Harry Chapin

All my life's a circle;
Sunrise and sundown;
Moon rolls thru the nighttime;
Till the daybreak comes around.
All my life's a circle;
But I can't tell you why;
Season's spinning round again;
The years keep rollin' by.
It seems like I've been here before;
I can't remember when;
But I've got this funny feeling;
That we'll all be together again.
No straight lines make up my life;
And all my roads have bends;
There's no clear-cut beginnings;
And so far no dead-ends.

James M. Bennett, Rabbi