Human Sexuality Curriculum Task Force

At the end of this month, students in the 2005/2006 bnei mitzvah class and their families will gather for the annual bnei mitzvah retreat that begins the final preparation process for this important milestone. Many of these students began their Judaic studies in kindergarten as part of our Religious School program. In third grade, they began their study of Hebrew. Watching those students in their very first year of Hebrew training with our incredible third grade teachers is, for me, the very definition of enthusiasm. Sometimes I worry that one of them is going to dislocate a shoulder while frantically waving an arm in the air hoping to be called upon to answer the next question.

Over the years, I watch these students grow. In our weekly Hebrew School tfillah, the third graders struggle to follow along in the text with their finger as I slowly chant Vahavta. By fourth grade, they can not only follow along but have learned to chant along with me. Each year, their repertoire of Hebrew blessings grows, and each year we wrestle together with questions like what does it mean to pray, how do we hear Gods voice, how does the choreography of worship help or hinder prayer, or what is the purpose of praying the same prayers day after day, week after week. Their answers often challenge me to think about my own prayers in new ways.

The ceremony of bar or bat mitzvah is a milestone an opportunity to demonstrate the skills that have been mastered. The students lead the Shabbat morning worship service, read from our sacred texts, and teach the congregation something about those texts. It is also a time for families to reflect on a journey of 13 years and express their hopes and dreams for the future.

The goal of the Temple Beth El staff is to make bar/bat mitzvah a wonderful experience, one that the whole family will treasure. Despite the large number of bnei mitzvah, we are committed to treating each student as a unique individual challenging each student to master as much of the service and their Torah and Haftarah portions as they are able, and helping them find self-expression by interpreting the texts they have chosen.

Preparing for bar or bat mitzvah is an enormous task almost always the biggest single project any of our students have ever taken on. The staff lays out the project step by step to insure success. We recognize that the process, more than the result, is what is going to have the greatest impact on the future of each student. And most importantly, this is a crucial opportunity to help build self-confidence and self-esteem in each of our children. Nothing could be more important at this delicate and challenging age. Throughout the process, our children learn the importance and blessing of community.

They are supported every step of the way by their families, their piers, and the staff and clergy of Temple Beth El.

One of the things that I am most proud of in our program is that the bar or bat mitzvah ceremony is not the end of the process. Many of our students go on to study at the Consolidated Hebrew High School and are confirmed in the tenth grade. But for me, even more wonderful is that so many of our students want to share what they have learned with others. Beginning in the eighth grade, our students can be madrichim in the bnei mitzvah program, tutoring our 12-year-old students in preparation for their own bar or bat mitzvah. At present, we have 28 student tutors. Even more impressive, some 15 of them are learning how to teach trope so that, in addition to tutoring students on the service itself, they can help students learn how to chant their Torah and Haftarah portions. A rabbi once told me that our job as Jewish professionals is to pass Jewish tradition along to our congregants, empower them with knowledge and put ourselves out of business. Our bnei mitzvah madrichim program comes pretty close to achieving that goal.

Sometimes I wonder what our ancestors were thinking by putting 13-year-olds in front of an entire congregation to lead worship and teach. What a terribly awkward age to expect such a thing! Yet week after week I see students emerge with newfound pride and confidence, and know that in achieving this milestone, we have helped set them on the path to success in everything they do throughout their lives.

L’shalom,
Andrew Bernard
Cantor